Wake > Shower > Teeth > Shave > Breakfast > Commute > Procrastinate > Work a bit > Bullshit meeting > Work a bit more > Eat > Check Facebook > Phone calls > Reddit > Commute > Beer > Computer > Couch > TV > Dinner > Wonder what you’re doing with your life > Couch > Bed.
For years that was my life. I can tell you…
This is no way to live.
Why do we do trudge on like this, even for a single day? We all struggle with the grind at times, but it doesn't have to be this way.
Most people have a tough time getting out of bed. We hit snooze and feel that nagging low-level dread when our feet hit the floor. If a hollow routine is what we have to look forward to, is it any surprise?
Getting out of bed becomes an act of sheer willpower, and we deserve medals for being strong enough and responsible enough to keep doing it.
Let’s all say it together: f*** that.
Life is the greatest miracle in the history of the Universe. Instead of treating it like a grind, let’s make a decision in this moment to find a compelling reason to jump out of bed.
Let me help you find your Why.
“There is only one really serious philosophical question, and that is suicide.”
- Albert Camus
The Why is our reason for not killing ourselves. That may sound histrionic but it’s the brutal truth. We live for 70-ish years on a spinning orb at the end of a small galaxy in a 14-billion-year old Universe. In the grand scheme, nothing any human can do could possibly matter. Why do anything at all?
You can torture yourself with this question or you can take wisdom from the band Trooper and choose to believe "We're here for a good time, not a long time." Your reason to live is up to you create.
Every person has a Why. It may be as bleak as “pay the lousy bills so I can support children who will grow up to pass the same survival mindset on to my children.” Or it may be as lofty as curing cancer or ending human trafficking.
You get a better why the more conscious thought you give to it.
The survivalist struggles to get through every waking hour. The dreamer falls more in love with his life each day.
“Where you invest your love, you invest your life.”
- Mumford and Sons
Your values are signposts toward your Why. To discover your values look at:
Take just 5 minutes now to think about your values and write them down (Seriously, go do it. I’ll wait.)
If your space is filled with maps and globes, you probably have a high value on travel. If your friends are sick of hearing you talk about your business then you value money, or being your own boss. If your Visa statement looks like a clothing store inventory list, you probably love dressing well and looking good.
Don’t judge your values or try to adopt someone else’s – whatever excites you is a powerful tool you can use to construct a better life, fast. Get to know your values well and use them to lead you to your Why.
Call it your Why, or call it your major, definite purpose.
Use your values as a starting point and ask, "what is the #1 thing you want to do with your life right now?" This sounds daunting, but you can change your answer at any time and if you’re lucky you’ll have dozens of Whys in your lifetime. Pick what feels right.
It's far riskier to avoid thinking about this than to pick something that you'll have to rethink later.
I did this exercise recently so I’ll use myself to illustrate how to do it.
My home is filled with books that help me learn about business, grow spiritually, mentally, and emotionally, improve my relationships, and increase my strength at the gym. This is because I’ve placed a high value on personal development.
Most days I spend working on my business, talking with other entrepreneurs on Reddit or forums about my business, and yes, I’m the guy that annoys his friends and fiancée by talking incessantly about his business. This is because I highly value financial freedom.
When I look at my bank account I see that I spend a healthy amount on dinner and drinks with friends, going to movies, camping, concerts, and anything that lets me spend time with my closest friends, because I have a high value on relationships.
Great, so I value personal development, financial freedom, and relationships. What is my why? What can I do with my life that will give me a powerful reason to jump out of bed in the morning and run at 100% energy, pushing my boundaries every day? What will make me feel fulfilled, and like I’m doing something meaningful with my life?
The short version: Rogue Refined. The business side gives me enough financial freedom to travel when I want, to set my own hours, to answer to no one but my customers, and to pick up and go hiking in the woods on a Tuesday morning.
Building a business means you must constantly be improving not just your systems but also yourself, and your mind. And the schedule gives me lots of time to read and write about personal development.
Through this blog I get to write weekly about subjects that I’m passionate about. I strive to be authentic, so I attract good people into my life. Writing is a powerful way to connect with people and it fulfils my need for positive relationships with people.
In choosing to make Rogue Refined my Why – my major, definite purpose – I act each day in line with my values.
I’ve tried a cup of coffee beside the bed, wakeup lights, loud radios, annoying alarms, puzzle locks, you name it, but the most effective way I’ve found to jump out of bed is to have an irresistible reason for doing it, a magnetic Why.
A man with a purpose is unstoppable.
This process may take you 5 minutes, or 5 months, but now is the best time to start. This exercise is only the beginning. When you decide what's essential to you, make a plan and immediately take one step toward your goal.
When you live for your Why you’ll unlock massive energy, have better relationships, and you’ll smile a lot more.
I'd love to connect with you. Leave me a comment to let me know what Why drives you.
Rogue Refined helps ambitious men elevate their lives with uncommon goods and useful lifehacks.